Week 2

I’m not going to lie – I’m very nervous about standing on that scale today.

This week hasn’t been one of my better weeks, but I don’t feel bad about that.  I’ve been sick for eight days now and although I’m slowly starting to feel better, I haven’t felt well enough to do any exercising this week.  Last Sunday I was afraid that if I got any worse I was going to end up in the hospital with pneumonia.  Luckily, I’ve gotten better since then, but I still try to hack up a lung every now and again.  Sorry for the visual . . .

Regardless of how I did on the scale I will be loosing one of my iTunes downloads.  Even though I feel justified for not working out this week I still want to follow through with the consequences I have in place.  After all, I could have done my back exercises; they’re not aerobic and would have been fine to do later this week when I was feeling slightly better.

Alright – time to face my destiny.  I’ll be back, go hum the theme song of jeopardy to yourself.  Or Jaws . . . that one might be more appropriate.

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Much better than I thought it would be!  295.8!  Which means I didn't loose a lot of weight (just .8 pounds), but I really thought I had gained so not too bad!

My goals for this week are to first get better so I can actually work out.  Second I want to come up with some sort of menu guide so that I have some healthy options of things to eat, so I'm not just eating whatever sounds good.

*cough*

So, Thursday evening I began feeling ill.  I stuffed my face full of Vitamin C, but it did little (if anything) to prevent the sickness onslaught I've experienced the last few days.  Since I haven't been able to walk up a flight of stairs without feeling faint I decided that exercise was probably not the best thing for my body.

Luckily, it has not been an emotional blow.  My first response when I have emotional blows is to eat until they go away (that would be the opposite of what I'm trying to accomplish . . . ).  Instead, I just veg on the couch and have some Progresso Chicken Noodle Soup that my roommate bought me (seriously, she is so sweet!)

But this has me curious . . . how do people deal with managing their weight when they feel sick?  The only thing I can think to do is to just eat healthy and in moderation, while trying to get my strength back.  Then once I'm better to start going back to the gym.  My previous policy was to throw it all out the window and then start over once I'm better, but since that's never done me much good, I'd rather not.

Here's where you give me your suggestions (*hint, hint*). . .

Week 1!

So the first thing that I did this morning (besides wondering why the heck I was up at 8 am on a Saturday . . . ) was weigh myself.  Good news people!  I was down 5.4 pounds!!!  Wooohoooo!!!

I attribute this change to two things.  First, I went from a very sedative lifestyle to a semi-active one.  Going from working out never in a week to 2 or 3 times a week makes a big difference.  The second thing is watching what I eat.  I've cut my breakfast and lunch portions nearly in half, while eating a healthier dinner.  (Sometimes.)

I was not perfect this week, and I will dare to say that I probably never will be.  But it is encouraging to see those kind of numbers after just one week.  

No Pain, No Gain.

Working out is the epitome of an oxymoron.

Think about it, you put yourself in a lot of pain, so that you can feel better.  Or, you can say that you exhaust yourself so that you have more energy.  Who thought of this???  Oh yeah, it's like a natural law or something. . . I'm thinking law of the harvest, you reap what you sow type thing.

So, if you're a couch potato you will eventually look like a potato.

But if you work out all the time and eat carrots then you'll eventually look like a carrot - orange with green hair.

Okay, this posting has gone waaaaaay off topic.

I actually got on tonight to talk about my knee . . . I don't know where it all went wrong.  Anyway, I went to my ward's Relief Society Gathering night (because it's not Enrichment anymore . . .) and we had a dance class.  It was a good, light cardio with some conditioning.  It was fun to see all us white girls trying to do hip hop.  Man I am WHITE!!

Well, earlier in the day my knee was hurting - which is not totally unusual as I hurt my knee about 10 years ago.  I decided to go anyway, because I wanted to work out and this would be a nice change up from my usual.  Well . . . now I can't really put a lot of weight on it.  I iced it for about an hour when I got home and it does feel better, so I'm hoping that sleep will heal the rest.

This is a problem that has often plagued my weight loss attempts.  I get really good at working out regularly just to have my knee, back, foot, arm, etc, go out on me to the point that I can't do much.  I want to be fit, but it doesn't make sense to hurt myself in the process.  So, no working out for me until my knee feels better.  Hopefully, that will be tomorrow.  In the meantime, I watch what I eat and ice the knee.

Being Sabotaged!

Part 1: Self Sabotage

Saturday night I decided to stay up and make cookies for my ward choir, which was starting up again after a year's hiatus (I'm not above bribery).  To my credit, as cookies go they're pretty healthy.  They're banana cookies and only had a 1/2 cup of butter, 1 cup of sugar and chocolate chips in them.  My usual cookies have about 2 cups of butter, 3 cups of sugar, 1 cup of peanut butter, etc . . .

The biggest problem is that I made 2 1/2 dozen of these cookies and only 7 people came to choir.  So there they sit on my dining room table . . . mocking me. . .  calling out to me . . ..  Argh!!!

Part 2: Sabotage by others

In the three and a half years that I've worked at my job I have received exactly one gift that was meant specifically for me.  Well, today when I got to work I had a package from the parents of a former student that I had helped get into college.  It was a box of cookies.

COOKIES!!!

And it wasn't those gross cookies that come in tins around Christmas time that you get for your neighbor that you don't really like, but feel obligated to give a gift to.  No, these were gourmet chocolate dipped cookies.  The kind you want to snack on all day long until your bloated body finally waddles out the door to the car.

I should have taken them out to my car the second I had them in my office.

Good for me though, I didn't snack on them all day.  I had a few more than I should have, but I didn't eat as many of them as I would have a week ago.  Now they're sitting on my dinning room table.  Mocking me. . . .  Calling out to me. . . .

Well, ward choir needs more bribes next Sunday.

The "Back" Workout

So those of you that know me well know that about a year ago I injured my back pretty badly and I've spent a long time trying to recover from that.  Today for my work out I decided to do my back "stretches" that my doctor gave me to strengthen my back.  I figured that it didn't really count as a workout since it was just stretches.

It counts - I hurt more right now after 30 minutes of "stretching" than I did Thursday after I did elliptical for 20 minutes and circuit workout for another 20.

Ouch!

The great thing about this work out though was my roommate's cat Casanova decided that I was trying a new way to play with him.  While I was doing the Superman Stretch (exercise #5 on this link) he decided that I was alternating my arms for his amusement and would race back and forth in between them to get me to rub his head and back.  I was laughing so hard that it hurt!  But I've heard that laughing is a good way to strengthen your core, so maybe he was trying to help me out!   He's a cute cat!

I need to do these exercises more often, especially if I don't want to hurt my back again.  That would be a really bad thing.  However, I had forgotten how much they hurt!

Buying a Scale

BLARG!!!

Who created the torture devise known as the bathroom scale???  I didn't own one before today so I went to my friendly neighborhood Target and bought one. 

It took all my courage to stand on it.

But I did, and it really wasn't too bad, since this is the beginning, the start, the catalyst, if you will.  It's all downhill from here.  Or uphill.  Dang.

Well, we now have a starting weight: 302.0 lbs.  Wish me luck!!

No More the Fat Girl! The Beginning

I've always been overweight.  I've known that, my doctors have known that, random people on the street know that.  

I've wanted to change for some time, and I make commitments to myself year after year to do better.  I've been in Weight Watchers.  I joined a gym.  I've done lots of things to make weight loss a reality for myself, but they never last.

A year ago I was doing fairly well, I had been going to the gym regularly and was feeling good.  And then I hurt my back.  Everything changed then.  I was now under doctors orders to not go the the gym.  I wasn't supposed to do any running, bending, twisting or lifting until further notice.  I was in constant pain and nothing seemed to be helping.  So I went to an old fall back - I ate my emotions.  Some of the days where I couldn't even stand up straight I would eat a whole pizza and half a carton of ice cream.  Very healthy, I know. 

Well, here it is, nearly a year later and I'm doing much better.  I'm still not supposed to do a lot of lifting, but I'm able to do some.  

I went to the doctor earlier this week for an unrelated reason and I got the shocker of my life at the mandatory weigh in.  I weighed over 300 pounds.  I knew I had gained weight, but I had no idea I had gained that much weight.  

So I decided to start this blog, I figured this would hold me accountable for weighing in every week and making a continued effort.  I'm not really sure what kind of format my post will take.  Most likely it'll be a combination of my struggles and my successes.  

I've already decided that one of the best ways to keep myself motivated is to have a reward/consequence system in place.  Each time I work out (gym, swimming, going for a walk or hike etc) for 20 minutes or more I earn one download on iTunes.  Each pound I lose I earn $1 towards new clothes.  However, if I gain weight, each pound I gain will result in $1 lost in that account and if I don't work out at least twice a week I will loose one of my iTunes downloads.  

Let the weight loss begin!